My Story
I grew up healthy. I got colds sometimes like normal people, but that’s about it. I exercised, I played soccer and basketball and baseball and ran cross country. I worked diligently on my creative passions like photography and film and artwork in general. When I was a child, I built my own creations with Legos for hours and hours and got completely lost in it. I have always been inspired and incredibly motivated to work towards my dreams. And I have never experienced any sort of connection between my mood or state of mind and my drive to create as an artist - this drive is there whether I’m having a good day or a bad day, a good mood or a bad mood.
I had a blessed, magical childhood filled with creativity and a very physically strong adolescence, still filled with creativity, awe and wonder at the world.
However, my health took a sudden drastic shift in 2004, when I was 21 after traveling abroad and I have been struggling with mild to extremely severe health problems ever since.
In college I dreamed of becoming a war or documentary photographer in the future, traveling the world telling important stories that needed awareness.
I have travelled alone extensively since I was 14, both throughout the United States and abroad, but ever since I was 21, every time I traveled my health seemed to plummet. I had vertigo and severe lightheadedness that worsened with exercise from 2004-2007 that often left me sitting alone in my dorm room at Bennington College with my head against the wall to try to reinforce a lack of movement and ease the uncomfortable feeling. But I have always been inspired and dedicated and never imagined I'd wind up where I am now. So I kept going, kept pushing myself to do everything I wanted to do, thinking that it would pass or that doctors would figure out what was causing my health problems. I drove through every state West of the Mississippi River photographing for my "Under The American Map" series with this lightheadedness. I refused to let it stop me. My trip to India in 2007 was the last straw it seems. From 2009-2013 I became really sick, with digestive issues, less energy, need for more rest, etc.
I started a wedding photography business in 2009 when I realized I no longer had the energy to hold a full time job, thinking that it was a blessing in disguise because once I got my health back I would be making money doing something I loved. After a year things were looking really good business wise, I was going to start making a good living off of my new business and it was so exciting and so much fun. But it took me longer and longer to recover from the intense physical requirements of shooting a wedding. I was exhausted to the point where most people would say they were too sick to keep going by the time I loaded my gear into the car, and the rest of the whole day running around photographing often for 16+ hours straight came from will power alone. When I couldn't recover in a week after one wedding in order to shoot the next wedding, I decided I had to give it up which was devastating especially given what it represented - losing a career I had built up to since my creative play as a child. That was in 2010. From 2010-2012 I was bedridden much of the time, my health and mobility slowly decreasing. In 2012 I was forced to rest in bed most of the day, saving up energy for little bits of projects like writing this, or working on some photographs for a half hour or an hour on a good day.
After seeing countless doctors and specialists in every area of medicine I could find for 8 years starting in 2004 when I was 21, having blood drawn over and over again, literally hundreds of tests done and constantly being told there was “nothing wrong with me”, I was finally diagnosed with Chronic Fatigue Syndrome/Myalgic Encephalomyelitis by Dr. Andy Kogelnik at the Open Medicine Institute in Mtn View CA. But I was devastated to lean that there is no cure.
The Symptoms of Chronic Fatigue Syndrome, or Myalgic Encephalomyelitis (ME/CFS), vary from patient to patient. The most fundamental symptom is debilitating fatigue that worsens after physical or mental exertion. But fatigue is much too mild a word. I liked to compare the state I was in in 2012 to staying up for two nights in a row while fasting, then getting drunk. The state you would be in on the third day- hung over, not having slept or eaten in 3 days- is close, but still better than many ME/CFS patients feel every day. "Total body shut down" would be a better phrase than "fatigue" because you are at a point where your body physically does not have the energy to keep going. If our body's ran on batteries, mine was never able to charge past 5%.
Patients with ME/CFS experience something that is often called Post Exertional Malaise.. Most people, including people afflicted with many other illnesses improve with exercise. Even after an intense workout or a long day of work, they recover after a night's rest. Patients with ME/CFS experience a severe worsening of physical symptoms during or after exercise. We have a limited amount of energy (far less than healthy people) often called an "energy envelope". If we push ourselves to keep going past this, the symptoms worsen significantly and it often takes days or weeks to return to where we were before. Some patients are permanently worsened. No amount of willpower, happiness or excitement changes this. I can be out of my mind with bliss and still run out of energy to work on something. There are some new studies examining this unique symptom and they are finding that patients with ME/CFS react differently to exercise. We will see much more on this in the near future and hopefully see a diagnostic test emerge from this research soon. See my post called "Saying Below Energy Limits" and "Sensing Your Energy Limits" for more information about pacing and the energy limits imposed by ME/CFS.
I spent the first years of this illness pushing myself. I thought it would eventual go away, and I tried to just keep going and do as much as I could. I didn't want to surrender to it, or let it shape my life. If I had known I had ME/CFS and the consequences of over exertion, I would not be nearly as sick as I am today. There are a million things I would not have pushed myself to do, like ride my bike to college in San Francisco, which made me feel horrible, but I wanted to be riding my bike so I pushed myself to do it. This is why awareness of ME/CFS and the symptoms and dangers of over exertion are so important to spread to the general public, especially with millions of new ME/CFS patients from Long Covid (Long Covid when it includes Post Exertional Malaise (PEM) as a symptom is ME/CFS caused by Covid). If they know that they have ME/CFS and how to manage it, they can not only prevent themselves from getting much much worse, but possibly fully recover if they are very careful not to overexert themselves right after developing symptoms.
In 2013 I was bedridden most of the time. I couldn’t walk much because of circulation and muscle problems in my legs and arms. I didn’t even have the energy to sustain computer work or conversation with people for more than short amounts of time. But some people were much worse than I was then, which I later experienced to a devastating extent myself!
I had a blessed, magical childhood filled with creativity and a very physically strong adolescence, still filled with creativity, awe and wonder at the world.
However, my health took a sudden drastic shift in 2004, when I was 21 after traveling abroad and I have been struggling with mild to extremely severe health problems ever since.
In college I dreamed of becoming a war or documentary photographer in the future, traveling the world telling important stories that needed awareness.
I have travelled alone extensively since I was 14, both throughout the United States and abroad, but ever since I was 21, every time I traveled my health seemed to plummet. I had vertigo and severe lightheadedness that worsened with exercise from 2004-2007 that often left me sitting alone in my dorm room at Bennington College with my head against the wall to try to reinforce a lack of movement and ease the uncomfortable feeling. But I have always been inspired and dedicated and never imagined I'd wind up where I am now. So I kept going, kept pushing myself to do everything I wanted to do, thinking that it would pass or that doctors would figure out what was causing my health problems. I drove through every state West of the Mississippi River photographing for my "Under The American Map" series with this lightheadedness. I refused to let it stop me. My trip to India in 2007 was the last straw it seems. From 2009-2013 I became really sick, with digestive issues, less energy, need for more rest, etc.
I started a wedding photography business in 2009 when I realized I no longer had the energy to hold a full time job, thinking that it was a blessing in disguise because once I got my health back I would be making money doing something I loved. After a year things were looking really good business wise, I was going to start making a good living off of my new business and it was so exciting and so much fun. But it took me longer and longer to recover from the intense physical requirements of shooting a wedding. I was exhausted to the point where most people would say they were too sick to keep going by the time I loaded my gear into the car, and the rest of the whole day running around photographing often for 16+ hours straight came from will power alone. When I couldn't recover in a week after one wedding in order to shoot the next wedding, I decided I had to give it up which was devastating especially given what it represented - losing a career I had built up to since my creative play as a child. That was in 2010. From 2010-2012 I was bedridden much of the time, my health and mobility slowly decreasing. In 2012 I was forced to rest in bed most of the day, saving up energy for little bits of projects like writing this, or working on some photographs for a half hour or an hour on a good day.
After seeing countless doctors and specialists in every area of medicine I could find for 8 years starting in 2004 when I was 21, having blood drawn over and over again, literally hundreds of tests done and constantly being told there was “nothing wrong with me”, I was finally diagnosed with Chronic Fatigue Syndrome/Myalgic Encephalomyelitis by Dr. Andy Kogelnik at the Open Medicine Institute in Mtn View CA. But I was devastated to lean that there is no cure.
The Symptoms of Chronic Fatigue Syndrome, or Myalgic Encephalomyelitis (ME/CFS), vary from patient to patient. The most fundamental symptom is debilitating fatigue that worsens after physical or mental exertion. But fatigue is much too mild a word. I liked to compare the state I was in in 2012 to staying up for two nights in a row while fasting, then getting drunk. The state you would be in on the third day- hung over, not having slept or eaten in 3 days- is close, but still better than many ME/CFS patients feel every day. "Total body shut down" would be a better phrase than "fatigue" because you are at a point where your body physically does not have the energy to keep going. If our body's ran on batteries, mine was never able to charge past 5%.
Patients with ME/CFS experience something that is often called Post Exertional Malaise.. Most people, including people afflicted with many other illnesses improve with exercise. Even after an intense workout or a long day of work, they recover after a night's rest. Patients with ME/CFS experience a severe worsening of physical symptoms during or after exercise. We have a limited amount of energy (far less than healthy people) often called an "energy envelope". If we push ourselves to keep going past this, the symptoms worsen significantly and it often takes days or weeks to return to where we were before. Some patients are permanently worsened. No amount of willpower, happiness or excitement changes this. I can be out of my mind with bliss and still run out of energy to work on something. There are some new studies examining this unique symptom and they are finding that patients with ME/CFS react differently to exercise. We will see much more on this in the near future and hopefully see a diagnostic test emerge from this research soon. See my post called "Saying Below Energy Limits" and "Sensing Your Energy Limits" for more information about pacing and the energy limits imposed by ME/CFS.
I spent the first years of this illness pushing myself. I thought it would eventual go away, and I tried to just keep going and do as much as I could. I didn't want to surrender to it, or let it shape my life. If I had known I had ME/CFS and the consequences of over exertion, I would not be nearly as sick as I am today. There are a million things I would not have pushed myself to do, like ride my bike to college in San Francisco, which made me feel horrible, but I wanted to be riding my bike so I pushed myself to do it. This is why awareness of ME/CFS and the symptoms and dangers of over exertion are so important to spread to the general public, especially with millions of new ME/CFS patients from Long Covid (Long Covid when it includes Post Exertional Malaise (PEM) as a symptom is ME/CFS caused by Covid). If they know that they have ME/CFS and how to manage it, they can not only prevent themselves from getting much much worse, but possibly fully recover if they are very careful not to overexert themselves right after developing symptoms.
In 2013 I was bedridden most of the time. I couldn’t walk much because of circulation and muscle problems in my legs and arms. I didn’t even have the energy to sustain computer work or conversation with people for more than short amounts of time. But some people were much worse than I was then, which I later experienced to a devastating extent myself!
June 2013 : Getting Much Worse
Really sick. I can't talk. Can't type/text enough to communicate. Haven't had a conversation with someone in 6 months…
[These are the exact words from an update I wrote on this website in June 2013 and it was as much as I was able to type, and the last time I wrote anything until 2020]
[These are the exact words from an update I wrote on this website in June 2013 and it was as much as I was able to type, and the last time I wrote anything until 2020]
June 2013 - April 2020 : Living Hell
During these 7 years from 2013-2020 I experienced a living hell.
You can read a detailed account of my experience living with Extremely Severe ME/CFS during these 7 years in my published manuscript here.
Sunk into a pit of one of the most severe cases of ME/CFS ever known worldwide, My stomach slowly became completely paralyzed in 2013 as I slowly starved to death, finally getting a Jtube inserted into my stomach which saved my life. (A Jtube is a feeding tube inserted into the stomach that delivers liquid food to the intestines, bypassing the stomach.). Just before getting the Jtube inserted I weighed 115 pounds and I am 6'-4". And I was only able to eat 2 tiny sips of maple syrup everyday just to keep my brain from completely shutting down.
My stomach continued getting worse from trying to take sublingual medications, thinking they wouldn't hurt my stomach, I would lie in bed on my stomach, face down when I took the sublingual, so that nothing went down my throat. But one day, I made a mistake and a bit got down and that was the last time I was able to put anything - food or water in my mouth. I currently cannot eat even a tiny crumb of food or put a drop of water in my mouth or it hurts my stomach which would make it worse and I could loose the ability to accept food from the jtube which would mean I would not be able to get nutrition of any kind and once again starve to death. This is a very stressful situation to live in every day for what is now 11 years.
I also lost the ability to speak in 2013 when I became bedridden. I still have not spoken a word to this day.
I couldn't do anything while lying in bed during this period. I could not even touch a phone or computer, much less use them. There were periods when I could write notes by hand, but most of the time I could not write or read or communicate in any way. I certainly could do any of the creative work or go on the adventures that used to bring so much meaning to my life. Even when I was alone in my room minor movement and activity was difficult for me and any extra stimulation that would bring joy or meaning to a healthy person hurt me. I knew my ceiling very well.
I couldn't think clearly due to blood circulation problems to my brain. So I couldn't daydream much either. Most of the time I lived in a thoughtless, feelingless void that was more horrific than anything I ever could have imagined.
I was alone in bed, in my room, all the time except for brief moments when caregivers came into my room to do basic tasks that kept me alive while I lied completely still (I couldn't move a muscle with a person in the room or I would crash and get worse). While they were in the room I had to wear earphones playing white noise covered by earmuffs to isolate me from them as much as possible. I had to keep my eyes closed with a towel covering them. And even this contact made the illness worse. If a caregiver made a tiny mistake deviating from the everyday routine it could be too much mental stimulation causing my brain to use more energy than it had and the consequences could be devastating to my health making me permanently worse.
I lost the ability to communicate in person in 2013 and came up with various ways of getting basic messages to my caregivers liken putting out prewritten cards saying basic things that I could put in strategic places (like "more/less", "yes/no", "don't put this here/put this here", etc), or when I got too sick to tolerate written words on cards, I used paper towels folded into arrows pointed at things I needed help with, which often took my caregivers hours to figure out and made me much worse. I could not tolerate much visual or audio stimulus- I could only look out my window for about 5 seconds before I crashed and the sound of a neighbor talking caused a crash. Anyone talking in my room made me crash and these crashes made me much worse. I was completely alone with no communication with the outside world or other human beings for 7 years.
I also had to keep to a daily routine because otherwise it was too difficult to avoid doing too much and accidentally exceeding my energy limits which made me worse. If I ever went way above these limits I could die. So my life lacked any spontaneity as I had to do as close as possible to the same things every day, in the same room, which was temperature controlled and air filtered so I was very disconnected from the world, the seasons, even simple things like sunlight or the smell of the air or the sound of the wind in the trees.
You can read more about my experience living with Extremely Severe ME/CFS during these 7 years in my published manuscript here.
Every single person in the world should be terrified at the prospect of getting ME/CFS. Anyone could wind up with ME/CFS and not only lose their entire lives, but experience what I have described above.
But you can do something about it today. Donate to ME/CFS research here:
You can read a detailed account of my experience living with Extremely Severe ME/CFS during these 7 years in my published manuscript here.
Sunk into a pit of one of the most severe cases of ME/CFS ever known worldwide, My stomach slowly became completely paralyzed in 2013 as I slowly starved to death, finally getting a Jtube inserted into my stomach which saved my life. (A Jtube is a feeding tube inserted into the stomach that delivers liquid food to the intestines, bypassing the stomach.). Just before getting the Jtube inserted I weighed 115 pounds and I am 6'-4". And I was only able to eat 2 tiny sips of maple syrup everyday just to keep my brain from completely shutting down.
My stomach continued getting worse from trying to take sublingual medications, thinking they wouldn't hurt my stomach, I would lie in bed on my stomach, face down when I took the sublingual, so that nothing went down my throat. But one day, I made a mistake and a bit got down and that was the last time I was able to put anything - food or water in my mouth. I currently cannot eat even a tiny crumb of food or put a drop of water in my mouth or it hurts my stomach which would make it worse and I could loose the ability to accept food from the jtube which would mean I would not be able to get nutrition of any kind and once again starve to death. This is a very stressful situation to live in every day for what is now 11 years.

I also lost the ability to speak in 2013 when I became bedridden. I still have not spoken a word to this day.
I couldn't do anything while lying in bed during this period. I could not even touch a phone or computer, much less use them. There were periods when I could write notes by hand, but most of the time I could not write or read or communicate in any way. I certainly could do any of the creative work or go on the adventures that used to bring so much meaning to my life. Even when I was alone in my room minor movement and activity was difficult for me and any extra stimulation that would bring joy or meaning to a healthy person hurt me. I knew my ceiling very well.
I couldn't think clearly due to blood circulation problems to my brain. So I couldn't daydream much either. Most of the time I lived in a thoughtless, feelingless void that was more horrific than anything I ever could have imagined.
I was alone in bed, in my room, all the time except for brief moments when caregivers came into my room to do basic tasks that kept me alive while I lied completely still (I couldn't move a muscle with a person in the room or I would crash and get worse). While they were in the room I had to wear earphones playing white noise covered by earmuffs to isolate me from them as much as possible. I had to keep my eyes closed with a towel covering them. And even this contact made the illness worse. If a caregiver made a tiny mistake deviating from the everyday routine it could be too much mental stimulation causing my brain to use more energy than it had and the consequences could be devastating to my health making me permanently worse.
I lost the ability to communicate in person in 2013 and came up with various ways of getting basic messages to my caregivers liken putting out prewritten cards saying basic things that I could put in strategic places (like "more/less", "yes/no", "don't put this here/put this here", etc), or when I got too sick to tolerate written words on cards, I used paper towels folded into arrows pointed at things I needed help with, which often took my caregivers hours to figure out and made me much worse. I could not tolerate much visual or audio stimulus- I could only look out my window for about 5 seconds before I crashed and the sound of a neighbor talking caused a crash. Anyone talking in my room made me crash and these crashes made me much worse. I was completely alone with no communication with the outside world or other human beings for 7 years.
I also had to keep to a daily routine because otherwise it was too difficult to avoid doing too much and accidentally exceeding my energy limits which made me worse. If I ever went way above these limits I could die. So my life lacked any spontaneity as I had to do as close as possible to the same things every day, in the same room, which was temperature controlled and air filtered so I was very disconnected from the world, the seasons, even simple things like sunlight or the smell of the air or the sound of the wind in the trees.
You can read more about my experience living with Extremely Severe ME/CFS during these 7 years in my published manuscript here.
Every single person in the world should be terrified at the prospect of getting ME/CFS. Anyone could wind up with ME/CFS and not only lose their entire lives, but experience what I have described above.
But you can do something about it today. Donate to ME/CFS research here:
8-5-2020 : Extremely Severe ME/CFS
[Written in 2020]
I haven’t left my room for 7 years except when I have to go to the hospital to change my J-tube feeding tube out of medical necessity. I am only able to do this without dying by being sedated with Ativan the entire time as well as Fentanyl during the procedure.I haven’t been touched by another human being without it hurting me in 7 years.
I haven’t been able to speak for 7 years. I haven’t had a conversation with another human being in 8 years.
I haven’t eaten a crumb of food or felt a drop of water in my mouth in 6 years. I’m alive because of nutrients being pumped into my body with machines and tubes.
I haven’t taken a shower in 7 years. I clean the most needed parts of myself with baby wipes every day and it absolutely exhausts me. I can’t handle having someone else clean me.
I haven’t cut my own toe nails in 7 years.
I haven’t been able to hold or even touch my camera in 7 years (photography is my passion and my life)
I haven’t peed standing up in 9 years. I haven’t walked to the bathroom to pee in 7 years. I pee in a urinal in bed.
I haven’t made love to a woman in 9 years.
I haven’t brushed my teeth in 6 years. It hurts my stomach, making it worse and putting my ability to tolerate the feeding tube at risk. Which puts my life at risk.
I haven’t seen a dentist in 9 years.
I haven’t been able to tolerate the sound of another person’s voice without being sedated in 7 years. I wear heavy duty earmuffs whenever my caregivers are in my room for the bare minimum of time. They can’t talk and have to be as quiet and gentle as possible.
I haven’t felt like a human being in 7 years. All humanity has been taken from me by ME/CFS. I live only to continue living. There is no love, joy, passion, creation. Only endless numbered days.
I fight to survive for all those living and dying in silence and darkness.
#severeMEweek #severeME #MillionsMissing
2020-2023 : Small Improvement
In April 2020 I started a drug called Abilify which at high doses is an anti-psychotic drug (30mg) but at very low doses (2mg) slowly increased from .5mg to 2mg over the course of 6 months was found to help some ME/CFS patients in a new study. I was very luckily one of those ME/CFS patients that it helped and it slowly started making me a bit better. One day I realized I could listen to music again and it was absolute bliss; Waves of bliss running through my whole body. It was a slow path to getting about 2% better but that 2% improved my quality of life by probably 2000%. I soon could have my caregiver come Into my room without earmuffs and pantomime what I needed with them. All of my sensitivities decreased. I got to start working on creative projects again. I discovered a love for writing and was able to write without Ativan and start a Facebook page and a blog here on this website, and then continue my photography project documenting my life with ME/CFS and start an instagram page posting those images. I won many awards for this project, which you can see here , though this project is vast, spanning from 2010 to present, and only a small number of images were allowed to be entered into these awards. After improving from Abilify I was also able to chat with some people I met on instagram and make some new friends, which was a big deal after being so isolated within myself for so long.
This improvement peaked in about 2022 and then I sadly started getting worse again, as the drug often stops working for ME/CFS patients. I slowly have been able to do less and less over the last year, but try my best to fill my life with meaning with the energy I do have.
This improvement peaked in about 2022 and then I sadly started getting worse again, as the drug often stops working for ME/CFS patients. I slowly have been able to do less and less over the last year, but try my best to fill my life with meaning with the energy I do have.
8-2022 : "Living Death / Living Life"
Cort Johnson Wrote an article about my photography work, all my advocacy work and where I am in general now.
Click here to read it
See the awards I have won
Click here to read it
See the awards I have won
07/25/2023 : Back In Chains; My Health Plummets
I suddenly and unexpectedly got much worse for unknown reasons and I am unable to type unless medicated. I’m writing this now on Ativan again like in 2020.
I am honestly suffering so much. I lost everything for 7 long years, stuck in a black hole of nothingness. And then in 2020 Abilify allowed me to carve out a little bit of light into that black hole and create a tiny life that brought me so much meaning and purpose and moments of joy and love and life. And that has all been taken back again, lost to the void.
Being unable to communicate again has put me into a state of almost constant panic and stress that is impossible to describe unless you have known it. Even touching my phone often times would make me crash.
I feel so repressed, it's as if a shatterproof, bulletproof glass box has been secured around my body, but it’s not even big enough to fit my whole body. It is much smaller than that. It’s smaller than even my whole mind to fit inside, it’s the size of a tiny corner of my mind and I’m banging on the glass walls screaming to get out. Screams that cannot be heard or felt by anyone.
Some things have remained better though. I am still able to have my caregiver come into my room and move while she is in here and pantomime to her.
I spend my days dreaming of all the things I want to make and do, and. Then I get meds and my sensitivity is calmed down and I can type and I feel. Immense pressure to do so much from a long list in my head from things to buy to working on my website to writing posts and trying to fundraise for my 40th Birthday Fundraiser. The ups and downs of this are torturous, I long with all my being for consistent ability to work on things again.
I stopped Abilify when I got worse again, and stayed off of it for 3 months. I then started at a low dose and slowly. Increased it to 2mg again which I have been on for a week or so. I hope and pray that Abilify helps make me better again. So I can work on things, but more so because I want to be contributing to the ME/CFS community and raising awareness, understanding, hope, and funding .
I have very little control over this, however. All I can do is be as healthy as possible with carefully chosen medications and supplements, try to pace myself and wait and see.
I love you all.
I am honestly suffering so much. I lost everything for 7 long years, stuck in a black hole of nothingness. And then in 2020 Abilify allowed me to carve out a little bit of light into that black hole and create a tiny life that brought me so much meaning and purpose and moments of joy and love and life. And that has all been taken back again, lost to the void.
Being unable to communicate again has put me into a state of almost constant panic and stress that is impossible to describe unless you have known it. Even touching my phone often times would make me crash.
I feel so repressed, it's as if a shatterproof, bulletproof glass box has been secured around my body, but it’s not even big enough to fit my whole body. It is much smaller than that. It’s smaller than even my whole mind to fit inside, it’s the size of a tiny corner of my mind and I’m banging on the glass walls screaming to get out. Screams that cannot be heard or felt by anyone.
Some things have remained better though. I am still able to have my caregiver come into my room and move while she is in here and pantomime to her.
I spend my days dreaming of all the things I want to make and do, and. Then I get meds and my sensitivity is calmed down and I can type and I feel. Immense pressure to do so much from a long list in my head from things to buy to working on my website to writing posts and trying to fundraise for my 40th Birthday Fundraiser. The ups and downs of this are torturous, I long with all my being for consistent ability to work on things again.
I stopped Abilify when I got worse again, and stayed off of it for 3 months. I then started at a low dose and slowly. Increased it to 2mg again which I have been on for a week or so. I hope and pray that Abilify helps make me better again. So I can work on things, but more so because I want to be contributing to the ME/CFS community and raising awareness, understanding, hope, and funding .
I have very little control over this, however. All I can do is be as healthy as possible with carefully chosen medications and supplements, try to pace myself and wait and see.
I love you all.