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Beauty Never Fades

I'm currently in a post crash phase and very sick. From a crash who’s cause I do not know.

I want to do it. I can picture myself doing it. But I cannot move to actually do it. Work on writing, make a photograph, work on a project, chat with a friend, write an email. My mind wants to act but my body cannot. There is a barrier between mind and body that keeps me laying here staring at the things I cannot engage with. The ideas swirl around me like Wraiths or Demontors, sucking the life from me, tormenting me with the prospect of beauty that cannot be.

But I wait because I know it is still out there. Beauty never fades. Even when we can't feel it or see it, it surrounds us, soaking us in its shining light. Sometimes it is just hard to see or feel, like the sun behind a cloudy sky. Remember that these clouds will part again and we will feel the sun again as the tide recedes and illuminates the beauty all around us.

For now, I reach out in the darkness for the light that I know is there. I pull up my collar and shutter the windows and wait.

Don’t ever give up. Because even in your darkest moments beauty surrounds you. You may feel like it has forsaken you, but it is there. Sometimes storms can last for months or years and cover the sun and it feels like there is no more light. But no storm lasts forever. And there is always another notch on your belt and another cover to add to your bed. Take a breath, brace against the clouds of darkness and know it is not forever. This darkness will at some point relinquish to the beauty, light, and life flowing all around you and all the way through you.

And you will realize that it never actually left.

There will be more storms to come, but if we know that the sun is always there behind the clouds, we can weather any storm.



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